I dove head first into a boiling pool that scalded my skin and left me burnt to the bone. 

It hurt to remain. 

It hurt to move. 

What followed on the shore was convulsion and torment, in its absolute purest form. 

Yet I am expected to dive in again. 

And I am condemned for finding it difficult to do so. 

Perhaps I should apologize instead, 

For my lack of skin. 



You grieve because you forget that what defines this world is betrayal. 

It brings you only further into yourself, for you are scared of giving away too much again. 

But to trust is not to not expect pain. 

Because attaching to anything other than Him is pain in itself. 

But trust is to give part of yourself away knowing that you will be fine if that part of you is misused, or lost. 

As it always has been. 

And that is okay. 

That is normal. 



I find that we are all worthless until the we accept the measure of our value as something eternal.

Your once appreciated humour may grow to become stale,
Your once inspiring success may eventually fade into oblivion,

But in the ocean of mistakes and shortcomings and forgets,

There is always God,

to show you to yourself as the beauty you are capable of becoming.


I miss now

“I miss the seconds we have not yet shared.

I have lost count of the times I have lost myself in my ocean of

wondrous dreams,

that I see without the need for slumber

and my eyes wide open.

I can’t help but feel at times that what I see with my real eyes is nothing more than mere memory,

that I am fortunate enough to be able to live again.

Perhaps it is a chance for me to rid myself of regrets

that I have not yet had.

Or to render things right,

that have not yet gone wrong.

Or to appreciate everything about you,

except your presence,

in the hope that I am doing things right the first time around.

And maybe, 

just maybe,


in all His Glory,

sees that too.

And misses me back for it.


I miss the seconds we have not yet shared.”